It's not that I don't have faith in myself to see things through, it's just I'm not going to be hard on myself if things don't work out quite the way I wanted. Surely, it's just as important to try, as it is to get what you were after. If I've learned anything during my 30 something years it's that you get back what you put in oh, and you should acknowledge that you're a fabulous person at least once a day - every day. It's not cheesy; it's healthy.
So (in no order) here is a little ol' list of NOT resolutions that I've written up for myself in Jan 2010.
We want to move to Brighton. I was born by the sea and lots of green fields in Dorset so I miss both very much. Brighton is a cheerful, arty, and colourful place with lots of sea and countryside all around. Later this year Al has to go to Brighton for his 2nd year as a junior doctor so hopefully we'll have found somewhere to live in Brighton by the time he has to go. Fingers crossed! Also because I love the countryside so much I wouldn't want to raise a family in London - which brings me onto my next New Years (NOT) Resolution....
I'm most fortunate to be able to feel like I've achieved a fair few things that I hoped for myself, that is except for one thing.... I'm now on the wrong side of 35 so I know that we don't have any time left to phfaff around with this immensely important and scary decision. But I don't mind admitting to you lovely readers that I STILL don't feel ready and I still feel like I'm a child myself (I know Al feels the same way I do!) That said, something in me says I should just shaddup and DO IT! Friends have told me that the fear (more or less) melts away to be replaced by feelings of love and protectiveness - and I can see that. But there's so much to worry about and I know from my lovely Mum that as soon as you become a mum you spend a whole heap of time worrying - that and being proud, and learning, and teaching, and laughing, and being driven up the wall, and wondering, and running around, and sewing (yep boy or girl they will know how to sew), and cooking, and being very tired. Yes it has to be one of the most engaging and rewarding and hardest things you can do in a lifetime, which is why I've left it rather late. Was it the same for you before you became a mum/dad? Did you (over) worry about it, do you still?
I will have finished writing my book by Spring. I'm writing for David & Charles publishers who are lovely to work with and they are utter craft fiends (I couldn't ask for more). My book will be released in Autumn 2010. You might find me mooching around in your local bookshop putting my book at the front of all the craft display shelves (I'll be the deranged woman hiding behind a plant pot - thinly disguised in a spotty headscarf and Hollywood sunglasses). He he!
So the thing about writing book is you end up with writers cramp/block/muffin top. Don't get me wrong, I'm not a muffin top fascist. You have to love who and what you are, but for me that is a bit tricky when I can only wear elasticated clothing. I didn't envision possible book signings and all of that jazz wearing a tent. I'll be dammed if I have to shop for new larger size wardrobe (especially when I hate clothes shopping). You can giggle at me if you want, but lately I admit to huffing and puffing around in my front room to the dulcet tones of the Troll Woman in the picture - Jillian Michaels. She's not a troll per se, more her exercise regime is ugly and vicious. Ouch! but it's beginning to work... Blimey if I end having a body like hers... don't be daft, I'd just like to get back into my jeans again. "...and another 8 squats and 8 lunges; a body like this doesn't come for free..."
Of course there's no point in subjecting myself to muscular aches and pains if all I'm going to do is stuff my face with KFC (mmm I LOVE KFC). Nope, it's out with the KFC and in with more veg, tofu, quorn, oily fish, and less meat. I'll still eat cakes (I'm no one's martyr), but I'll try my best to stick to cakes that I have made myself - um yeah!
When my book is finished I will be getting into more designing - I can't wait! Al got me the above posh pencil for Xmas. It's a joy to use. So all my patterns from here on in will have been sketched with the aid this splendid pencil.
I am going have a go at keeping up with my abandoned Facebook this year. Above is my FaceSlap profile pic. (I did it messing around with mac Photobooth).
I'm sure this is overly optimistic (what with everything else), but all through the book writing process I have dreamt about clothes making. So even if I don't get round to cutting any dress making cloth, I can still drool over the idea of making and wearing this cute dress by Collette.
Do you have any New Years (NOT) Resolutions?